Anti Sue
by Flag
Summary: What would actually happen if a girl from modern day dropped into The Outsiders.


Disclaimer: Not mine, thanks.  
A/N: The final Oneshot posting of Flag for The Outsiders. The result of reading one too many girl-drops-into-the-outsiders stories.

Lindsay was walking down the street, kicking stones, moping about the loss of her boyfriend who was a jock nerd prep wierdo when she started sneezing. _Achoo! Achoo! Achoo_! When Lindsay opened her eyes from sneezing, she saw she wasn't in 2007 anymore, but what seemed to be a different world! Looking around even closer, she saw that she was in a room with 6 very hot guys!

"Like, oh my god, you guys are like, so hot!" Lindsay exclaimed, jumping up and down, clapping her hands together. She didn't really care anymore that the world she knew had disappeared while she was having an allergic reaction to her own dandruff and she quickly accepted the fact that the only way to get back was to fix whatever problem was happening here!

"Who are you?!" Darry asked, standing up suddenly and walking towards her in a menacing fashion.

Lindsay looked around before speaking again. "Like, oh god, you guys are The Outsiders! Oh my, you're Darry!" she squeaked. "I've been like, reading about you in class, and I always thought that Dally was ugly, because like, Ponyboy said so, but then like, I saw the movie and I was like 'No way! He's totally so hot! Oh my god Matt Dillon…'"

"Who you calling ugly?" Dally asked, standing up and pounding his hand with his fist.

"Like, it wasn't like, me that said it! I only read it! Ponyboy said it, like oh my god! Punch his head in, like I didn't like him because like-"

"Listen girl, I don't care. Get out of my house, now, and don't pop in uninvited anymore because you just broke my coffee table," Darry said, getting slightly agitated.

"Like, no, I can't like go, because like, I have to save you!" she said, running over to Johnny and grabbing his arm.

"I don't need savin'!" Johnny exclaimed, shaking his arm out of her grasp. "At least, not from anything other than you!"

"Like, oh my God yes you do!" she said.

"Why's she talking like she's totally drunk or stoned or something?" Soda asked with a puzzled look on his face.

"Like, what like, are you talking about?! Ohh my god," she said, catching glimpse of Soda, she started to drool. Unfortunately, Darry had had enough and he grabbed one of her arms and led her towards the door.

"Listen girl, we got a rumble down in the lot to go to in a few minutes and we can't have you rambling at us like this." With that, Darry made to slam the door in her face. Milliseconds before the door actually shut, she shouted out at lightning speed- "WatchoutforburningchurchesJohnny!"

"Goodbye, girl!" Two-Bit shouted from somewhere inside the house.

So they were going to leave poor Lindsay out of the rumble! She had just as much reason to fight as them, even though she knew nothing about why they were fighting, or who was fighting, or what was happening… So she devised a plan.

----

Lindsay ran around the corner, completely out of breath. They thought she couldn't fight! She knew that's what they thought, even though they hadn't said it. Boy, she'd prove them wrong! She had a plan, to run into the rumble and kick some major ass even though she'd never fought before. She knew she had some hidden talent in there somewhere that hadn't shown before, the 2235235 times she'd been beat up! And she had a disguise. Boy, those Greasers would never recognize her!

She continued running, but then saw she was late and the rumble was already in full swing!

"Like, STOPPPP!" she shouted. Fortunately, no one heard or. Or no one bothered to pay any attention to her.

"STOP!" she shouted again, and this time she was heard because she shouted at such a pitch she nearly shattered everyone's eardrums.

"Like, I can fight!" she shouted, and everyone started to laugh.

"You can't put on a hat and wash off your makeup and look like a man, Lindsay. Go away," Steve said, and the rumble continued.

_Forget this, I can fight!_ Lindsay said to herself and ran out into the middle of the rumble and took on the biggest Soc she could find, despite the fact that he was over 6 feet tall and she was a little under 5. Unfortunately, or fortunately depending how you look at it, this wasn't a rumble that Ponyboy could participate in. Unfortunately for Lindsay, she only realized it was a weapon rumble when she got stabbed in the chest 17 times by people angered by her antics.

"What's this?" Bob asked, picking up something from her purse which everyone was rooting through, rumble forgotten along with the dead body.

"What is that?" someone else asked.

Suddenly, the foreign object started ringing and Bob started pressing random buttons until a voice finally came through.

"Hello? Like, Lindsay, hi! Like oh my god, you won't believe like, what just happened to me today! Like, hello? Like, Lindsay, are you there?"

Bob promptly threw the phone on the ground, jumped on it, then ran away screaming like a little girl along with the rest of the Soc's.

The end.


End file.
